Love Life Live Lent ~ Shrove Tuesday

Our church is doing this really cool thing this year for Lent.  It's called Love Life Live Lent (for more infor see www.livelent.net).  On Sunday our Pastor handed out these nifty little booklets that outline an activity for someone - a family in my case - to do each of the 40 days of Lent.  Our church gave the entire program a big kick off last night for Shrove Tuesday (affectionately known by many as 'Mardi Gras').

Truth: Even though I technically grew up "Catholic," I never really understood the whole point of Lent. It's only been in the last year or two I've really started to "get it."

Truth: Before a coulpe of weeks ago I had never heard the words 'Shrove Tuesday' uttered anywhere.

Truth:  I've never really gotten the whole 'Mardi Gras' thing.  It always sounded like an insane party I wanted nothing to do with.  Turns out it has something to do with Lent????

So, here's what I learned yesterday...

Lent runs from Ash Wednesday to Easter.  (That I knew before.)  It lasts forty days not counting Sundays (new factoid for me!).  It is meant to be a reminder of Jesus' forty days in the desert, and it was used to help people prepare for Baptism through fasting (hence the "giving something up during Lent" idea) because Baptisms used to take place on Easter.  Lent is, in essence, about really focusing on God.  Today, some people still give up things, but it's also becoming common to "add things" during this time.  Of course, when you choose to sacrifice something, it shouldn't be something you don't want anyway.  God would not be impressed if I gave up bananas for lent since I hate them anyway.  And, on the flip side, when choosing to add something, it shouldn't be for selfish reasons, but should be something that is going to help yourself and others focus more on God.  I, for instance, am adding in prayer time since I'm the laziest intentional prayer known to man.

Now about this 'Shrove Tuesday' thing....  The first time I heard our Pastor mention Shrove Tuesday it was in conjunction with the words 'pancakes' and 'church dinner.'  My immediate reaction was...Pancakes - Yum!  Church dinner - No cooking!  No dishes!  I quickly got lost in fantasies involving syrup and a kitchen that stayed clean for an entire night and I kinda missed the rest of what he had to say on the issue...  Ooops....

Good thing that at our Shrove Tuesday pancake dinner last night they passed out these little factoid sheets.  Here's what it had to say about 'Shrove Tuesday':

The day before Lent.  'Shrove' comes from 'shrive,' meaning to confess.  People were enouraged to say sorry to God before the start of Lent.  Traditionally, it was also a day to prepare for the Lenten fast by using up all the rich food in the house - particularly butter and eggs - which has led to the tradition of having pancakes on this day.

 

Okay, so that explained the point.  And the pancakes.  But what in the world was the connection to 'Mardi Gras.'  Seriously, when I hear the words 'mardi gras' I think drunken beer fest.  I do not think church, Lent, Jesus, Easter.  Turns out that in many places around the world (Brazil being the example the factoid sheet used) hold (or used to hold anyway - I'm not too sure on the upkeep of this tradition) carnivals on Shrove Tuesday.  It was meant to be a day of fun and celebration.  I guess somewhere along the line of history someone took a little Shrove Tuesday carnival (Mardi Gras) a little too far and lost the true meaning and purpose behind the day? 

 

Anyway, so here's the shortened verstion:

 

Shrove Tuesday (a.k.a. Mardi Gras) = pancakes/carnival = the day before Lent begins = time to draw closer to God

 

So, anyway, back to my church and our Shrove Tuesday kick off.  It was last night.  And at our church, obviously.  A bunch of us all got together, flipped and ate pancakes, and in general, just enjoyed each others company.  This worked out great since the day's activity in our Love Life Live Lent books was in fact "celebrate more" and they even suggested making pancakes!  Logan was so excited to be at church with his friends that he barely managed to swallow down one pancake before he was off and running with the other kids.  Gavin, on the other hand, really enjoyed eating his pancakes.  In particular, he enjoyed the orange juice.  He kept asking "More juice?"  At first I said yes.  By his third glass I started saying no (I was not changing wet sheets due to a leaky diaper people).  He quickly figured out that he didn't need to ask me, but that he just needed to charm someone standing by the juice table...  Oh boy... 

 

Over all, it was a fun night full of laughter and learning (for me anyway, obviously).  I'm really looking forward to our Ash Wednesday service tonight and then getting started on some of the daily activities planned out for us through this period of Lent!  In fact, I'm so excited about it, that I'm going to try and document it each day right here on my blog (hence this long post on Lent/Shrove Tuesday/Mardi Gras).  



the one where I want - and don't want - more kids

When I was younger - much younger, like grade school - I imagined having three kids.  The image has kind of stuck since then:  I was going to be the mother of three children.

Well, it sort of stuck...

See, when I was a kid I imagined having three daughters.  I currently have two sons.  Oh, and since I had no concept of the man I would marry and have children with, I just pretended I was a single mom (I'm guessing at that point I probably didn't really understand where babies came from...).  I am currently married (though sometimes, with our schedule, I kind of feel like a single mom...).  And the best part yet...I imagined living in the house next door to my parents (after all, what kid can imagine living without her parents?)!  I currently live over a six hour drive away from them.  In fact, I live in an entirely different state! 

So, when I say "the dream" sort of stuck, I really mean it didn't stick at all.  Except for the part about wanting three kids, of course.

Except lately, that part doesn't even seem appealing...

This morning I woke up at five to start the process of getting myself, a five year old, and a two year old ready for work/school/day care.  All.  By.  Myself.  (Justin was at school all night working on his thesis for graduation in May.)  This isn't an unusual sitution...nothing I'm not used to or can't handle.  Yet...today it was hard.  My Logan seems to be going through some kind of crazy defiant/angry stage where he intentionally pushes the limits of everything I ask him to do.  It doesn't happen everyday, but it happened this morning.  On top of that, Gavin, my normally super sweet 2 1/2 year old, seems to have been replaced by a new Gavin.  A super stubborn, super disobediant Gavin.  (I swear I don't know what happened!  I'm voting on alien abduction right now and putting in a request to have my Gavin returned to me!)  Between the two of them, everything was a battle this morning...

You can not wear the same pajamas you wore all day yesterday again today.

You have to brush your teeth.

No, you can not wear Mommy's make-up.

Put the pencil sharpner away - we are NOT taking it in the car!

Stop playing at the table and start eating!

For the twelfth time - put your shoes on!

No, you do not need my help to put your shoes on.  You're a big boy.

Don't pinch!  Or hit!  Or bite!

Stop trying to sharpen the eraser - it doesn't work that way!

Pencils are NOT swords!

And on it went....  Can you figure out which kid was causing which problem?  Hint, hint:  They were pretty equally responsible in most issues.

After a morning like this, I wonder why I ever wanted three kids.  Better yet, I wonder why, after a morning like this, I still even contemplate how GREAT! it would be to have three kids!  I blame it on Facebook.  All those friends of mine out there having cute, cuddly babies!  Granted, I remind myself that most of them are only having their first child.  Only a few are having their second child.  I can think of only a few more that have three children, and only one that is currently pregnant with her fourth!  And then I remind myself that its Facebook.  Most people don't go posting updates about how horrendous their child(ren) were that morning or that week or that month or even that year.  Nope.  They (myself included) tend to stick with the happy, fluffy updates.  It's natural after all to want to focus on the positives - especially where raising children in concerned!

I beginning to become more and more convinced that I'm in love with the concept of having another baby at this point more than the reality of having another baby.  Truth is, I'm in no position at this point in my life to take on that responsibility, so I guess I'll take all that baby longing and channel it into the two "babies" I already have...bad mornings and all.  After all, the bad mornings or days or weeks or even years, don't last, and its never really constant - it just feels that way sometimes...

Hmmm...in that case maybe a third child wouldn't be soooo bad...

...except maybe it would...

...or wouldn't...

See!  I still can't decide!  So, in that case, bring it on God!  Two kids now, three maybe someday (but probably not).  I'll take whatever You have meant for my life!

Two...

...or three...

...or maybe just two...

Are we there yet?

Not in an acutaly physical place, but in a place in time where everyone is healthy.  Are we there yet?  I really, really hope so.

When January ended, I had thought, had hoped, we were saying good-bye not only to January, but also to all the illness that had plagued our house hold all. month. long.

It started with Gavin.  One day he just stopped eating.  And started doing a lot of sleeping.  This lasted for almost three days (an entire weekend).  By the time Monday rolled around, he was feeling better, so we bypassed the doctor and called ourselves lucky that we had bypassed the worst of some kind of stomach virus.

Or so we thought.

That Monday I caught a nasty stomach virus and spent the evening glued to the bathroom floor.  I was so sick I had my friend, Erin pick up my boys and take them to school/day care.  I crashed on the couch hoping I would be the last to be struck down with this particular bug. 

And then the school called.

Logan had it, too.  I ended up having to haul myself up off the couch after a long night of sickness and head over to the school to pick up Logan who was also suffering from a sick tummy.  We spent the day home together - him concious, me mostly not.  He was ready to go back to school the next day, I was not, but we both returned.

By the time I was over the stomach bug, the really nasty cold hit.  I battled it for two weeks before caving, going to the doctor, and finding out I was really sick.  One big antibiotic shot in the hip and ten days of pills later, I was finally feeling better.  And once again hoping it would only be me.

But, it wasn't.  Once again I got called by the school, this time the nurse telling me Logan had a fever.  I picked him up, brought him home, and watched him pass out on the couch before six that evening and sleep until past six the next morning.  One trip to the doctor later, he was at his Gigi's house for the day diagnosed with the common cold.

That was January 30th.  January ended.  I hoped the sickness would, too.

It didn't.

Last Tuesday it was Justin bringing Gavin to the doctor.  It was Gavin who got diagnosed with the flu!  Luckily, I had been all smart and gotten him a flu shot.  Doc told us that was probably what kept him from getting the full-on nasty business that so many others were suffering with.  He wasn't out of the woods though.  He needed a high-powered steroid and breathing treatments to heal up his poor lungs.

Now, here we are a week later.  Everyone is healthy!

(knock on wood)

So, I ask again...  Are we there yet?  For real this time?  I really, really do hope so!

some January gifts

206.  microwave popcorn

 

207.  sunshine through icy trees, lighting them up like crystal

 

208.  icicles in afternoon sunshine

 

209.  hot apple cider

210.  chicken broth warm in a mug

211.  speeding ticket to remind me to SLOW down

212.  Bills paid and stacked to mail

213.  texting with Justin throughout the day

214.  Girls Night Out at The Artsy Cafe

215.  Laughter with friends

216.  scrapbooking fun

217.  sounds of boys playing nicely together in their room

218.  three day weekends!

219.  making the perfect hard boiled egg

 

220.  apple slices and PB shared between me and the boys

 

221.  Pretzles dipped in spinach dip

 

222.  baking cookies

223.  special delivery from Justin:  Starbuck's mocha

224.  Evenings laying in bed talking with Justin

225.  Sharing lunch at school with Logan

226.  perfect lines left in the carpet by the vacuum cleaner

227.  sick days to stay home, rest, and recover
228.  The Discovery Center
229.  Dutch apple cheescake compliments of Starbucks (and the Cheesecake Factory)
230.  Tall glace of iced tea lemonade - almost can make me believe its summer!
231.  Beer of tap paired with a plate of hot wings shared with Justin
232.  the bright white glow of a full moon
233.  Moonbeams peaking around clouds, lighting up the night sky

234.  "You're pretty cool" - Justin

235.  Two boys, hands folded, saying prayers in church

236.  Gavin singing as loud as he can during praise and worship
231.  thunderstorms
237.  Open windows letting in fresh air - in January!
238.  Falling asleep to the sound of rain falling steadily
239.  starting and finishing a book all in one day!
240.  antibiotics for healing
241.  Logan's negative strep test
242.  Gigi to the rescue!  Babysitting Logan while he's out sick from school
243.  expressing my thoughts and experiences through writing and pictures on my blog
244.  What I Read Wednesdays from School Teacher by Day...
245.  suprise gifts from Shelley at group

246.  my phone alarm to remind me to pray throughout the day
247.  snow hugging trees

248.  boys coloring together at the table

 



why I love the discovery center

First, there are dinosaur bones.  And you can dig for dinosaur bones.  My boys get a kick out of this.  Heck, I get a kick out of this!  I love digging along side my kiddos!

 

Then there's Wonderland.  Really, I love this place.  It keeps the boys occupied forever - Gavin especially.  I think he would have been content to stay in this room all. day. long.  I find it very sad that it is only for children five and under because that means that all too soon Logan will be too big for this pint sized wonderland.

 

The second floor is filled with all kinds of different things like this drinking fountian...

 

...and fun with magnets...

 

...and building...

 

 ....and music!

 

There are also a couple of great areas that I was so busy playing with the boys that I never got around to taking any pictures of.  They have all kinds of activites dealing with electricity, motion, and water.  Activities that kept us so busy that I never even stopped to think about snapping a picture or two!

 

A big section of one floor is all about the human body.  They have "veins" and "arteries" to climb through, bones to play with, teeth to brush, and eyeballs to explore.  Along with some great learning activities of course.  Logan was pretty excited about the bones, but wouldn't go near the fake brain!  Gavin just liked climbing all over everything.

 

A big hit is always the Discovery Town.  They have a grocery store, a house, and a movie theater!  This area really caught Gavin's attention.  Not surprising considering some of his favorite toys at home (and day care) are the cash register and the kitchen set!  There's also a newspaper room and a weather studio, but we avoided those things because they're a little over the boys' heads.

 

 

Logan may not have been as excited about Discovery Town, but he was pretty impressed with this giant bubble machine.  I actually felt bad when I had to make him leave so that other children could have a chance.  He was a good sport about it though!

 

All together, we spent over three hours in the Discovery Center this past Saturday!  Honestly, we could have stayed longer, because we never made it to at least one floor and I know for a fact Logan and Gavin would have each spent a lot longer in a couple of areas if one of them wasn't always so ready to move on to the next thing!  It also didn't help that it was after three and I had two very hungry boys that were ready for snack time!

 

I love the Discovery Center.  It is such a great place to go and spend a good chunk of the day learning and playing with my boys - especially on days that are too cold or too hot or rainy!  Plus, there's so much to do, that it doesn't get old going back multiple times a year.  We had a great afternoon, and I'm looking forward to the next time we head back there!

The week I barely remember

Most of last week is lost in a fog.  A fog brought on by a sinus infection and it turns out, bronchitis.  Two things stand out to me about last week:

1. I was sick.  So, so sick and too stubborn to really admit how bad it was and how much I just needed to stay home from work, go to the doctor, and rest.
2. My Logan, my baby, my five year old, learned to lie.  On purpose.

It was a tough week.  On top of being sick, I had to take on this issue that had cropped up with my son, an issue that went way past one little lie.

Logan, it seems, has been having a lot of trouble in school since we've come back from Christmas break.  Not academically.  Academically the child is right where he needs to be for a kindergartner in January - even a little ahead in some areas.  But socially, emotionally...well, that seems to be another story, and it is starting to really affect his behavior in school.  This isn't completely new - he struggled in pre-school and continued to strugge through the fall this year with little things like sitting still, following directions, listening, keeping his hands to himself.  All those little, but important, self-management skills. 

None of that was unexpected either.  He's a young kindergartner, only five and a half, not six until the end of June.  He barely made our state age cut off to go into kindergarten this year.  I expected some behavior issues because he was younger, because he would lack some of the months - even a whole year in some cases - that other students had had to mature.  Sending him to kindergarten this past fall was a big debate, a choice we took very seriously and discussed at length with his pre-school teacher.  In the end, we made the choice to send him because intellectually he was so ready.  And, behavior was an issue.  An issue that didn't seem to really be getting any better as the year progressed.

But, I didn't know how bad it had gotten.

And then, I discovered the lie.

He'd had a bad day at school last Friday.  So bad that his teacher had sent a note home to tell me about it.  A note that needed to be signed and returned on the next school day.  A note he hid from me and then told me he had had a good day.  A note he attempted to return to the teacher unsigned.  A note he then hid in his bag again with no intention of me finding.

But, find it I did.

And I asked him about it.  At first I thought it was from that day, and I was upset because he had just told me he had had a good day.  I confronted him and he caved.  Dropped his head and told me he'd had a bad day.  That he'd even had to talk to the principal! 

Then I looked a little closer at the note.  Realized that it wasn't from that day, that it was from the previous school day!  And again, his little blond head dropped and he started to cry as he admitted what he had done.

He was broken hearted.  I was broken hearted.  We were sad together.  I hugged him, told him I loved him, and loaded him in the car.  At home, he had to sit at the table and finish his work from school, work he hadn't finished there because of his behavior.  We had to talk about lying and why it is wrong.  We had to talk about good behavior and why it is necessary.  It was an early bedtime, a tough night all around.

The next morning I went in to talk to his teacher.  We came up with a plan.  I fought through the fog of sickness that afternoon to find, create, and print of "homework" for Logan, to make a plan for tackling bad days, giving consequences for poor choices, but not turning school and home into a miserable experience.  (Talk about a challenge!)  And that very first night, I had to put my plan to the test.

And it worked.

And the next night I had to do it again.

And he fought it.  And I stuck to it.  And it worked.

And the next day he had a good day!

And yesterday was Monday, and he had another good day!*

I figure we are far from out of the woods.  Considering his age, considering that it is going to take a few more years for things to even out with the others in his grade - all that means we will probably be dealing with similar issues in various forms for awhile.  But, having made it through this bump in the road gives me confidence that we can make it through the next.  And the next.  And the next....

Last week was tough.  I'm actually kind of glad I was sick so all the details are blurred and all I have to remember is what I need to remember:  Being a parent is tough work, an incredibly important job.  But, it is a job filled with wonder and beauty and love, a job I wouldn't trade for anything.  I love my children, I love Logan.  I love that I get to be there to help guide him toward being the person he was meant to be - bumps and all!


*I also caved, went to the doctor, got lectured on waiting too long to go to the doctor, got an antibiotic shot in the butt along with an oral prescription, and am starting to feel a little better finally.  Go figure!

a family hike

Back at the beginning of the month, Justin and I got a babysitter (Mimi rocks) for the boys and planned a day hiking trip up at Ha Ha Tonka on their seven mile trail.  We were super excited, really looking forward to getting outside and doing something together, just the two of us.

And then the weather was bad.  Really bad.

It was cold, dreary, windy, rainy, and eventually very icy.  At the last minute, we gave up, called off the hike, and found something "in-doors" to do that day.  Turns out we were each more disappointed then we wanted to let on to the other, and it ended up being kind of a bummer day all together.  Chalk it up to my almost complete inability to deal with a sudden, drastic change in plans.

Needless to say, when the forecast that week was predicting a sunny Saturday in the high fifties, Justin and I both had the same idea:  a hiking trip!  Course, we didn't have a baby sitter this time, but that turned out to be no obstacle.  We simply decided to make it a family hiking trip.

Yes, a family trip.  This means a seven mile hike with a five year old and a two year old.  I blame this insane idea on extreme cabin fever.  But really, it turned out great!  Sure, we had to shorten it down to five miles and we didn't do it nearly as quickly as we would have on our own, but that wasn't really the point.  The point was getting outside on an uncharacteristically warm day in January and spending time together as a family.

And we did just that.

Justin filled his pack up (he wanted to practice hiking with a full pack) with the usual stuff (tent, sleeping bag, etc) and food.  I made turkey sandwiches for everyone, filled a zip lock bag with pretzels and cheese its, grabbed apples, and packed water bottles.  Then we layered the boys and ourselves in shirts, coats, and hats; loaded up the car; and made the half hour (ish) drive up to the park.

We originally planned on having a picnic lunch while on the trail, but since we got there around eleven, we decided to eat on a bench at the trail opening.  Logan gobbled his sandwich down, while Gavin chose to take bites at his leisure while poking around in the leaves.  Before long, we were all done eating and he had barely started!  This meant that we basically started the hike out having to carry Gavin while he munched away.  Not the best way for me (or Justin) to conserve energy for a long hike!

We were off to a slow start.  Partly because we were letting the boys (mostly) walk it on their own and they were intrigued with every stick, rock, and leaf we passed by.  And then it was partly because I brought my camera hoping to take lots of cool pictures.  Turns out something with the meter in my camera is jacked up making it hard to adjust my settings correctly, and, well, Gavin really needed to poked and prodded frequently to keep moving.  Either way, I didn't get a lot of pictures after the first mile which took us about 40 minutes to hike!

We took a break at the first mile.  Let the boys sit and rest on a giant rock they found pretty nifty.  It probably wasn't more than a five minute break before we were up and on our way again!

The second mile went faster - mainly because we were doing a lot more carrying of Gavin.  At that point, we knew we weren't going to be able to do the full seven miles (the reality of hiking with two children had quickly sunk in), but figured we could still manage the shorter five mile loop.  So, we decided to move forward instead of heading back.  Of course, all of this was discussed while sitting on a bench at mile number two, sipping water.  Before the really hard work had even begun!

The next mile was a tough one.  Logan was wearing out, and I was pretty much done being able to carry Gavin.  His added weight and wiggliness was getting just too hard on my hips and knees.  Justin was probably the only one doing good at this point despite the fact that he was carrying a full pack! 

At mile three we took our longest - and last - break.  We stopped for a good half hour to sit, drink, snack, and potty.  It was a nice break for all of us as we rested, chatted, and munched on apples, pretzels, and cheese its.  The time went quickly, and then we were off again.

This was probably the hardest part of the hike for all of us...except maybe Gavin.  Logan's little five year old legs were tired, my joints were aching, and Justin was now not only carrying his fully loaded pack, but also all 27 pounds of Gavin!  And for a good mile and a half, Gavin was sleeping!  While he took a little siesta, Justin got to hall all of that limp with sleep weight up and down hills.  Poor guy should get a medal for that! 

(There was a lesson learned here:  When one is hiking with a two year old, one does not need a pack for one will simply end up carrying the two year old most of the time!)

Despite the last two miles of the hike being quite the workout, it was impossible not to enjoy the warm weather and beautiful scenery.  But, I gotta say, at that point, the most beautiful sight ended up being the sun rays glinting off the top of our car!

Surprisingly, the boys stayed awake for the entire car ride home!  We stopped at Walmart on our way to pick up a few things including Redbox movies for us and the kids and a couple of bottles of wine (that was just for us!).  Once home, I stuck our dirty boys in a big bubble bath and Justin headed out to our favorite Chinese restaurant for take-out.  After dinner we tucked the boys into the spare bedroom with their movie while Justin and I stayed out in the living room talking and eventually watching our own movie.  It was a great way to relax after a fun day outside!

I loved this Saturday family time!  Sure, there were challenges, but just being able to be outside, all of us together, more than made up for the hard parts.  I'd love to take another (much shorter) family hike again when another gorgeous day strikes on a day off!

198.  57 degree days in mid-January

199.  Family hikes at Ha Ha Tonka

200.  Wind rustling through tree branches

201.  knock-knock jokes with Logan

202.  Gavin asleep in Justin's arms near the end of our hike

203.  Boys splashing in a tub full of bubbles

204.  Chinese take-out picked up and brought home by Justin

205.  Wine paired with a redbox movie